Ranger Talk
by ryhoyarbie
Summary: This is a funny story with four ex rangers from different teams talking about some topics.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Power Rangers franchise. But if I did, I'd be filthy rich baby!**

_This is similar to NFL shows_ like _Inside The NFL, FOX NFL Sunday, The CBS Football show on Sunday, and the NBC Football show with Bob Costas on Sunday Night Football_

There was an oval circular table that could sit four people, similar to the anchor desk seen on FOX NFL Sunday, the football show on CBS on Sunday, etc.

The lights came on and shined Andros, the red Space Ranger, who was wearing a red short sleeved collar shirt and some blue jeans.

Andros was sitting looking at various papers as the camera focused on him. He looked at the camera and smiled, acting like a professional anchor of sorts.

"Good evening to everyone out there. I'm Andros, the red Space Ranger, and welcome to the series called Ranger Talk, where me and three other people talk about anything Power Rangers specific, with topics ranging from good battles, bad battles, when the franchise jumped the shark, who was over rated, etc."

A couple of snickers could be heard in the background while Andros was talking to the viewers. Andros managed to smile but shook his head in the process.

"And now with me is the panel, three rejects whose stardom is flushing down the toilet along with Brittney Spears's fame," Andros remarked.

That caused a lot of "oh's" and "get out of here" remarks from the rest of the panel.

"Let's take a look at the panel. Over to my right his ex black Mighty Morphin Power Ranger Zach," Andros continued.

Zach had his hear shaved short and was wearing blue jeans and a tight black short sleeved shirt. Zach managed to show a peace sign at the audience.

Andros looked on at Zach. "A peace sign?!" Andros remarked, smirking at the process.

Andros continued. "On my far left side, and I mean very far for obvious reasons, is Blake the blue navy thunder ranger from Power Rangers Ninja Storm," Andros continued.

Blake had his hair cut the same as from the series. He was wearing a blue buttoned down long sleeve shirt that was not tucked in, and white dress pants. Blake waved at the television audience who were watching at home.

"And finally, just so my producer wouldn't make the show to appear sexist, we decided to bring a woman ranger on the show. And Zach, Blake, try not to woo her while we discuss topics, will ya fellows!" Andros chuckled.

Blake and Zach rolled their eyes at Andros's remark.

"So please welcome Kendrix, the pink ranger from Power Rangers Lost Galaxy," Andros finished introducing the panel.

Kendrix had her hair in a pony tail. She was wearing a pink sweater with some blue jeans. Kendrix smiled at Blake and Zach. "It's a pleasure to be here Andros. Thanks for having me."

"So polite, now I can see why the producer wanted a woman on a show, to make sure she keeps us in check!" Andros laughed some more.

"Hey man, I already can check myself when it comes to impressing the ladies," Zach remarked.

Zach got up from his chair and walked over a few feet from it. "This is how I keep the ladies in check. Watch here ya'll."

Zach started doing some dance moves, from the moon walk, to the robot, to spinning on his back, etc. Zach was trying to impress the panel, but mostly just showing off for the heck of it.

Zach finished and looked at the others. "What did you guys think of that?"

"Is that what you did after you left your ranger team?" Blake asked. "I hope you don't do that for a living."

Zach scrunched his face at Blake and sat back down.

"Okay, now let's get started. Topic One, 'what was the worst fight in your experience as a ranger?'" Andros asked the three ex rangers. "Alright dance man, you start first!"

Zach rolled his eyes and sighed. "Okay, it had to be that one time where I was fighting a gigantic oyster that froze everybody."

"A giant oyster? I can see why there hasn't been any more oyster monsters on any of the ranger shows," Blake commented. "I could defeat an oyster monster without my ranger powers. Sounds like a cheesy monster, like that Pudgy Pig character."

"Hey that Pudgy Pig was eating everything in sight. That was a hard monster to beat," Zach replied.

"Okay, moving on to Blake. What was the hardest fight you had to endure," Andros continued.

"Definitely the time where my brother Hunter and I were shrunk inside a bag filled with popcorn and butter," Blake said. "It was hard to get out of that thing."

Zach's eyes widened. "A popcorn bag? Man, give me a break. Saying an oyster monster was easy. Hmffff….."

"Well folks it seems that the tempers here are rising up, which is the opposite of Ashlee Simpson's career," Andros laughed some more at his joke. "What about you Kendrix?"

"Oh definitely the time where I had to battle the pink Psycho Ranger and where I manage to die. Tough battle there," Kendrix answered.

Andros nodded. "I remember. I was there. It was tough," Andros added. "For me, it would have been the time where I lost my sister again to the dark forces."

Kendrix eyes glimmered with sympathy. "Ohh, that's so sad."

Kendris looked at Andros and placed her right hand on Andros's left hand for comfort.

Zach and Blake looked at what was going on and sighed, shaking their heads.

"Oh ya, I've still got it," Andros smirked.

"Anyway, on to topic two. Who is the most over hyped ranger from any series," Andros continued to read the questions.

"Definitely Tommy. How many freakin colors and ranger teams is he going to be on anyway?" Zach pointed out.

Andros nodded. "Okay, Blake, what do you think?"

"I'm agreeing with Zach. Tommy is over rated," Blake replied to the question.

"Finally Kendrix, tell us your answer," Andros looked at the woman.

"Agreeing with what has already been said. Tommy is over rated," Kendrix told her answer to the rest of the group.

"And by george I'm agreeing too. So it's unanimous," Andros said. "Funny, we all think Tommy is over rated. Hope he doesn't appear on the show in the future.

The group managed to laugh at the remark.

"Hey if he does and if he gets you, can I be the host?" Zach asked.

Andros shook his head. "I'll see if Jasonis available," Andros said while chuckling some more. "Okay, since we're on the topic of Tommy, here comes topic three. Do you think Tommy will appear in another ranger series? Zach?"

"Hell yes. He's already appeared in four, so why not make it five," Zach stated. "But he'll be appearing as the pink ranger this time."

Everyone started to laugh hard at Zach's remark.

"You're bad, you're really bad," Andros looked at Zach. "What about you Blake?"

"I think he'll come back, but for a cameo appearance of some kind," Blake responded.

"Okay, Kendrix, what about you?" Andros looked over at the pink ranger.

"He'll be back, but as a ranger with a rainbow costume!"

Everyone started to laugh uncontrollably.

"That's just wrong man. I don't think Tommy is gay," Zach stated at Kendrix.

"Hey, in Power Rangers Dino Thunder he was living in a house all by himself out in the woods, and he was pushing 30," Kendrix remarked. "So the question isn't that hard to swallow."

"I think Tommy will come back as a floating head mentoring another team," Andros said biting his tongue and laughing at the same time.

Everyone started to giggle at Andros's statement.

Andros shuffled the papers on his desk. "Okay, topic four, when did the Power Ranger franchise, the hallmark of all television, jump the shark?"

Zach cleared his throat. "That would be after I left. I mean, the show wasn't the same without the Zach man on it."

Blake was laughing and pointed a finger at Zach. "But the show was only a year and a half old when you left. And you said it jumped the shark at that point?"

"Oh, of course," Zach thought he was without a doubt correct.

"How about you Blake?" Andros asked.

"Had to be after my show went off the air," Blake smiled. "No other show could top our show."

The others sighed. Andros rolled his hand over his face.

"Well for me, I think the show jumped the shark after Time Force," Kendrix replied. "Did you all see how many zords the Wild Force Rangers had? I lost track of them all.

"Good thing we didn't have a team up with them," Blake sarcastically said.

"I'll have to go with the franchise jumping the shark when Lost Galaxy came out," Andros said.

Kendrix slapped him on the shoulder. "You jerk! To think, I put my hand on yours because I was feeling sorry for you."

"Hey, it did jump the shark. After Zordon's wave blasted every evil being in the galaxy, the Power Rangers franchise should have ended right there," Andros added.

Kendrix just crossed her arms and sighed, annoyed with Andros.

"Okay final thoughts for each of you," Andros replied.

"Tommy is over rated, and so is the love fest between him and Kimberly," Zach stated.

Andros looked over at Blake.

"Why were there two blue rangers on the show? They should have made Tori the pink ranger. Blue is my color after all," said Blake.

Andros looked over at Kendrix. "Your turn Kendrix."

"You're a grade A jerk," Kendrix replied, not even bothering to look at Andros.

"Thanks so much pumpkin," Andros remarked. "And for me, women are too emotional."

Kendrix slapped Andros on his left arm.

"And with that, we need to get out of here before this because another Jerry Springer episode!" Andros chuckled while rubbing the arm Kendrix hit. "Good night."


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Power Rangers franchise. But if I did, I'd be filthy rich baby!**

_This is similar to NFL shows_ like _Inside The NFL, FOX NFL Sunday, The CBS Football show on Sunday, and the NBC Football show with Bob Costas on Sunday Night Football_

The regular oval shaped desk was in the studio. The lights were dark but there was music that was being cued for play for the background.

Suddenly a light shined on Andros, the red Space Ranger, where he started in the weekly talk show called "Ranger Talk".

Andros was wearing another shirt that was red, this time with no collar, but was also short sleeved, and had a Nike logo on the left side of his chest. He was wearing some dirty brown cargo shorts.

Andros looked at the camera, and smiled, in a professional way. "Good evening, and welcome to Ranger Talk, the show where I, the very multi talented Andros"….

Some snickering interrupted Andros's presentation of himself. Andros looked around the table, annoyed with a serious expression on his face. He then looked back at the camera, regained his composure of being professional, smiled, and continued.

"As I was saying before I was rudely interrupted by these mere lower life forms, this is Ranger Talk, where me and three other people from past ranger teams will discuss topics about all things power rangers," Andros continued.

Andros looked at his right. "On my right is the lovely blue ranger from Power Rangers Mystic Force, Madison."

Madison was wearing a blue tube top with a white collared short sleeved shirt over it, and was wearing some light blue pants.

Madison smiled, blushing at the sight of her name being called. "Nice to be here."

"You are really cute, what are you doing after the show?" Andros asked, looking at Madison, lost in her lovely eyes and smile she was showing.

Suddenly a hand hit Andros in the chest, which caused Andros to gasp for breath.

Andros was holding his left hand across his chest and looking at a figure to his far left.

"Why'd you hit me, jackass?"

"Because you weren't doing your job, butthead. Now get back to introducing the rest of the panel," a voice said in the shadows.

Andros rolled his eyes. "And let me introduce you all to the person who just hit me. On the fat left, we have Jason, the red ranger from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, who's the biggest jock of them all."

The lights shined revealing Jason as he smiled at everyone. Jason was wearing a very skin tight red shirt, displaying the muscles he had on his chest and arms, and was also wearing black pants.

Madison was stunned at Jason's framework of muscles, almost at the sight of drooling. Jason noticed Madison's stare and winked at her, which Andros saw and got annoyed.

"Just remember you're older than her," Andros remarked at Jason.

Jason gave a threatening look at Andros. "Who gives a shit anyway."

That remark caught Andros off balanced, but he decided to proceed with the last introduction. "And right next to me is the green ranger from Power Rangers Light Speed Rescue, Joel."

Joel was wearing his regular brown cowboy hat, with a green short sleeved shirt with no collar, with a brown unbuttoned vest, and some brown pants. Joel took off his hat and nodded at the camera.

"Alright, let's get to topic one," Andros said. "Now……"

"Hold up, before we go any further, I think I should be the host for tonight's show,' Jason said, making a cocky face at Andros.

"You, why you?" Andros questioned. "I'm the host for this show."

"Look at you, you don't deserve to be the host," Jason responded. "You're all small and weak, with no muscles. I have no idea how you became a red ranger. You're nothing more than a toothpick as far as I'm concerned."

Andros was in rage. "A toothpick?"

That prompted Jason to get out of his chair, move over to Andros, and punch him in the face a few times, knocking him out.

Jason pushed Andros aside, which made Andros fall to the ground. Jason then got in Andros's chair and looked at Madison and Joel who were stunned at what Jason just did.

"I can't believe you just did that?" Joel remarked.

"Fuck you, you Broke Back Mountain reject," Jason replied.

"And to think, I was thinking of giving you my number after the show," Madison said.

"Like I give a crap about you, you pansy ass," Jason added, looking at Madison who was then starting to cry.

You see what you did, you made the lady cry, and from where I come, that's an insult," Joel said, trying to protect Madison.

Jason looked at Joel, annoyed with the man. "You want to come over here and make me be nice to her?"

Joel looked at Jason, and didn't say anything.

"I didn't think so, Clint Black reject, so shut up. Let's get this show going," Jason said. "Topic one, name one thing you hated during your time as a ranger."

Madison looked at Jason, wiping the few remaining tears from her eyes. "I hate doing this show with you."

"Name one thing you hated doing as a ranger, not as an ex ranger, Jason shouted at Madison. "What are you, retarded?"

That sent Madison running away, crying from Jason's comments.

Joel then got up, mad at Jason, and looked at him. "I think we need to have a talk."

Jason got up from his chair and faced Joel. "Alright, my right and left fists have something they want to say to you."

And with that, Jason punched Joel in the face which caused Joel to hit the ground, and get knocked out.

Jason shook his right hand a little and sat back down. "Alright, looks like I'll be answering these questions by myself then."

"My answer for topic one as for what one thing I hated during my stint as a ranger was giving up the reigns of leadership to that bastard Tommy Oliver." Jason angrily said. "I wanted to just break the tube of that bloated floating butt of a mentor Zordon when he said Tommy was now the leader. I'm the only leader for the team, not that idiot who lost his powers and kept on having doubts about himself and his sexual preference."

"Hi, I'm Tommy, blah, blah, blah……" Jason got pissed off and managed to break half of the news desk and. "That's what steroids can do for you kiddos! Hell ya!!!!" Jason said to the unconscious Joel and Andros who were just lying on the floor.

Suddenly, a small bald headed man with thick glasses and a little over weight came walking towards Jason. The man wasn't thrilled with the turn of events that just transpired. "Excuse me, but what are you doing?"

Jason looked up at the man. "Who in the world are you?"

The small man took a deep breath. "I'm the producer of this show, and you're ruining it!"

Jason wasn't intimidated by the man at all. "Is that so." Jason got up and faced the man who seemed half his size. Jason started to flex his arm muscle at the man and pointed to it, trying to scare the producer.

The man didn't want to press the matter further and retreated as Jason looked on.

"Go back to mommy, ya big baby!" Jason said while laughing at the same time.

"Moving on to the next topic," Jason said as he sat down and flung the card containing topic one behind him. "Topic two, when did you feel like you were about to lose an important battle."

Jason shook his head. "New topic for topic two, since it's so gay. Topic two question is, who was the most pathetic ranger on my team," Jason said, looking at the camera. "Easy, Billy. The man couldn't fight, always was a target for Bulk and Skull, and never worked out. I should have never been his friend, the pathetic loser."

Jason chunked topic two behind him and moved to topic three. He read the card and rolled his eyes at the question. "Okay, from now on, I'm changing the topic questions to my own questions. Topic three question is, who is the most annoying ranger of them all," Jason continued to look at the camera. "Easy, Cole, the red Wild Force Ranger. What a moron he was. Couldn't believe he was a red ranger."

Jason flung topic three behind him and moved on to topic four. "Topic four, who is the greatest ranger of them all? Jason said. "Easy, me."

Jason flung the topic four card behind him. "Next topic, which female ranger would I want to score with, cause I'm not scoring with no guy rangers, unlike Tommy, who whacks off to all the male rangers when he see's them," Jason responded. "I'd score with all of them, except that yellow ranger from Time Force who was ugly as a dog, Woof!"

**Thirty Minutes Later**

"Topic twenty one, which is worse, an attack from Lord Zedd, an attack from Rita Repulsa, or Tommy stealing my leadership position?" Jason said continuing to look at the camera. "I'd have to go with Tommy getting the role as leader. Damn I hate him."

"Topic twenty two, which female ranger from the team I was on would I want to bone?" Jason continued. "Katherine. But if it wasn't for Tommy getting her. Hell, Tommy got her and Kimberly, and they were both pink rangers. Maybe Tommy is hiding something deep within side him, with him liking pink and all. Yep, he likes to get it in the butt since he loves pink."

**Four Hours Later**

"Topic three hundred and two, who needed to work out more that was on another ranger team?" Jason said. "Andros definitely needs to work out more."

Jason looked at Andros who was still lying on the ground not moving. "Ain't that right buddy!"

"Topic three hundred and three" Jason said while trailing off. "Hey folks, this session of Ranger Talk could take a while. I'm having too much fun here. I wonder where little blue missy Madison went off to? Mmmmmmmm, Madison……………………."


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: I don't own the Power Rangers franchise. But if I did, I'd be filthy rich baby!**

_This is similar to NFL shows_ like _Inside The NFL, FOX NFL Sunday, The CBS Football show on Sunday, and the NBC Football show with Bob Costas on Sunday Night Football_

The regular oval shaped desk was in the studio. The lights were dark but there was music that was being cued for play for the background.

Suddenly a light shined on Andros, the red Space Ranger, where he was in the weekly talk show called "Ranger Talk".

Andros looked wearily at the camera, almost in a daze. He had on a neck brace around his neck, and a small cast around his nose. And to add even more injury into the mix, he had a right black eye.

Andros sighed a little. "Hello and welcome to 'Ranger Talk', the show where four rangers answer a series of questions relating to all things of the great and mighty Power Ranger fame," Andros mumbled, clearly not being about to speak loudly.

Andros continued. "As you know on last weeks show, there was a problem with one of the other ex rangers, that being Jason. He knocked me and the ex green Lightspeed Rescue Ranger Joel out, and made Madison, the blue Mystic Force Ranger, cry and storm off the set."

Andros got a sip of water and continued. "But many of you asked what happened to Jason after last week's show. Well, here's what happened. Watch the video.

A clip replaced Andros with Jason. Jason was on the set of 'Ranger Talk' and was being confronted by two men in security officer uniforms.

"You can't take me away. I'm the red ranger, biotches!" Jason shouted.

The two security guards tried to grab Jason by the arms but Jason hit them on their respective throats. Both guards fell back.

Jason started shouting. "Who's the man, who's the man now! You fuckers can't stop me!"

Suddenly another guard walked over to Jason and shot him in the back with a tranquilizer.

Jason started to move slower and slower, and finally fell down and collapsed.

The clip finished and was replaced with Andros. Andros smiled at the camera. "Now Jason will only appear in the Angel Grove Psychiatric Ward. So folks, address fan mail referring to Jason on that address," Andros stated with a smile. "Oh and his cell number is 47, just to help you all out."

"Well that means if there is another red ranger team up, I can take his place," a man in the shadows said.

Andros looked annoyingly at the person sitting right next to him to his left. "And let's move on. Right next to me on my left is the second red ranger from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers, Rocky. He was also the blue Zeo Ranger too."

Rocky looked at the camera. "I must apologize to all my fans out there who wanted to see me in the red ranger team up episode. I felt that it wasn't my place to go because it would have been weird to see two red rangers with the same costume on fighting in the same battle together."

Andros shook his head. "No one even called you to help us, fair and simple."

Rocky looked embarrassed. "That too."

Andros sighed and continued. "On my far left, sitting right next to Rocky, is Jen, the pink ranger from the Time Force series.

Jen had her brown hair curled. She looked at Andros. "Thanks for calling me here to do the show."

Andros nodded. "Finally we have Justin, the former blue Turbo Ranger with us."

The lights shined on at an almost twenty year old Justin, who had long brown messed up hair and a beard growing. Justin also had a bottle of rum in his left hand and had a cigarette in his right hand. Justin was trying to compose himself, although he kept on shaking his head very fast due to being drunk.

"What happened to you?" Andros looked at Justin, surprised.

"I'll tell you all what happened. My father never paid attention to me and was always working. Because of that, I went into depression and found other things to help me cope with my pain, booze and drugs," Justin said, still stammering.

Jen looked at Justin with a sympathetic emotion. "I'm from the year 3000 and we have medicine that can help you stop drinking and doing drugs."

Justin didn't want to have any help. "I've found the prescription for my pain and its booze and drugs, baby!" Justin then got a drink of rum and then proceeded to smoke his cigarette, almost causing himself to fall over.

Andros decided to move on. "Alright, are first topic is this, which villain would you want to be stuck with on an island? Goldar, Elgar, Ecliptor, or Nadira?"

"Well I have to say I would have been stuck with Elgar, since he's too stupid to do anything bad," Jen said.

"I would have picked Nadira. She became good afterwards," Rocky stated. "That and she's a woman, and I do love women."

Andros didn't buy Rocky's story. "I thought you were gay?"

Rocky's eyes shot up at Andros. "Hey, I'm not gay."

"Ya you are," Andros was positive. "I saw you holding hands with some guy this afternoon when you walked on to the set."

Rocky kicked Andros's foot, which cause Andros to cry out in pain for a second.

Justin looked on, still drinking and smoking. "We all know you're gay Rocky, so just admit it."

Rocky shot back at Justin. "You're the one who's gay Justin."

Justin stiffened a little. "I'm too far gone to care about liking anybody. I'm screwed up mentally because my father wasn't there to spend time with me. So I'm not gay," Justin drank some after his statement. "Christ, I hate my father for making me this way."

"I have no idea what we we're talking about now," Andros said. "On to topic two, what team would you want to be on, if you could choose one." Andros looked at Jen.

"I always wanted to be on the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers team," Jen stated.

Andros looked on at Jen. "Need I remind you it had this guy for a team leader, Andros said before pointing Jen to look at a picture of Jason who was being shot with tranquilizer gun by a security guard.

"Aw screw it," Jen shrugged her shoulders. "I already did it with two people from the same family, Wes and Alex."

"Two family members?" Andros almost gagged. "What a slut!"

"Ooooo, two family members," Rocky mumbled to himself with a smile on his face.

The others caught Rocky day dreaming until Rocky noticed everyone was looking at him and quickly regained himself.

Rocky cleared his throat. "I wouldn't have minded being on the Ninja Storm team."

"But Ninja Storm had a female blue ranger," Jen informed Rocky.

"I've always wondered how I would look in a skirt," Rocky tried to visualize what he would look like.

Andros stepped in. "Okay this is getting out of hand!" Andros looked over at Justin. "Which ranger team would you want to be on Justin?"

But by then Justin was passed out from drinking and had his head on the table, sleeping.

Andros shook his head. "This is the second week this show has sucked. What in the hell is wrong with all of these ex rangers anyway?"

Andros was about to move on to topic three before he saw Rocky putting nail polish on his fingernails.

"What are you doing!?" Andros's eyes lit up.

"Jen over hear gave me some of her nail polish and I was just comparing how nail polish from the year 3000 was like to nail polish from 2006," Rocky said, continuing to put more nail polish on his fingernails.

"And you see, the red nail polish would look great in that red dress you told me you had," Jen looked at Rocky.

"Red dress, red dress?!!" Andros started to panic.

"Okay, I'll admit it, I'm gay," Rocky said in a more feminine voice. "I like to pretend I'm the women in the relationship."

Andros started to freak out. He quickly got up and ran away in terror.

Rocky and Jen watched as Andros ran away from them.

Jen looked at Rocky. "What's his problem?"

Rocky sighed. "I guess he can't handle the fact that us girls are acting all girly on his macho male show."

Both started to giggle, with Rocky more so giggling like a little girl than as a man.


End file.
